So you find yourself at the end of the crossroad and you are faced with making the hardest of hard decisions. What happens when you have no more fight in you because you are just tired of being tired? When do you decide when enough is enough?
Do you continue to listen to popular culture with all the messages they inundate us with about relationships: see the good in people , relationships are work, rise above, pick your battles, and don’t have too many expectations or do you instead not put up with anyone’s disrespect, take care of you , set limits, leave abuse. The messaging becomes convoluted with all our decisions on how to properly set boundaries in the relationships. When is it the right time to leave our relationship? In this blog we are going to explore that question of when is enough…enough?
Now I know it is not easy to choose to leave a relationship but sometimes it could very well be the best decision for you and your said family (if you have one). Someone once said, “Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than to hurt yourself trying to put it back together.
- Does your relationship scream toxicity in anyway?
If so, consider leaving or seeking outside help to alleviate the toxicity.
- Do their actions not align with their words?
Anyone can contradict themselves once or twice even. After all we are humans that sometimes make mistakes. It’s the consistent behavior that really tells someone how they feel about you. If someone is telling you they want to reconcile with you yet their actions are not at all becoming where for instance you find that they are staying out late or not coming home at all. What does that really say about their desire to reconcile? We have got to start trusting actions because that is where the truth lives.
- Do you often make excuses for them to yourself and to others?
If you find yourself in this position, then chances are the behavior that you are trying to explain away is consistently unacceptable. A friend of mind and I am sure myself and many included can relate to a man that is not ready to fully commit to you and where you find yourself making excuses for that man by saying “Oh he is just not ready, he had a hard childhood, and he’s not had examples in his life where commitment was valued.” Even though all these things can be true…at the end of the day they are all excuses as to why he or she will not commit.
- Does this person flip things on you, as if their actions are your fault?
It’s hard to decipher unacceptable and consistent actions when you have somehow convinced yourself that you are responsible for them. For instance your partner may consistently ignore you and you may think it’s because you are too needy. From that said example you may be justifying their mistreatment because they try to make you feel like “you are in the wrong” or like “you are the crazy one”. No one should ever make you feel like that….your weaknesses should not become an excuse to intimidate or disparage you. Your significant other should be there to uplift you in every which way.
If you answered yes to any of these previously stated questions than it could very well be that time in your relationship where enough is enough and you have to make the decision to stay, set boundaries, or to go and move on. Nobody deserves to be in an unhealthy relationship. The question becomes now: can you be kind to yourself and walk away from what you know isn’t right?” As always I thank you for reading. Take care and be true.
I want to thank those who come back week after week. I am sorry I have not written in a few weeks. I have been doing life and it has been really busy. I recently got engaged. I know right….HUGE NEWS….and well things have been a whirlwind ever since. I hope to be back on track so please continue to stop in to read the latest blog. Thank you again Truthstars!